Monday, October 24, 2011

Pioneering The Wedding Trail

Remember in elementary school when you finished you lesson with Mavis Beacon (typing skills nazi) and got to play "The Oregon Trail" until the end of computer class?  I do.  Mostly because it was TOTALLY AWESOME.

At my school, we only had one CD-ROM of the game, so you had to finish first out of the entire class to play.  Clearly my teachers were dumb and didn't take advantage of the fact that we would literally do ANYTHING for 5 minutes on the Oregon Trail.  Anything. (even math.)  Some of the lessons I learned for pioneering the Oregon Trail has really prepared me for wedding planning.  Here are a things I learned while avoiding rattle snakes and cholera:

Use Your Money Wisely
Get a budget and get on it people.  Figure out exactly what you can afford to spend and plan on only using 75% of that.  Because guess what?  Your axle will break, your sister will get cholera, you won't know if you should ford the river, and little Jimmy will go missing.  What do all of those events have in common?  They are going to cost you time and money.  And that's where the extra 25% will go.  Anticipate wedding related emergencies, replacements, and unforeseen costs - you're going to have them no matter how well you plan.  Also, spend money on the important stuff.  Prioritize.  Plan.  

You can't carry the buffalo back :(
Don't waste time and resources on things you can't use.  A little extra food for emergencies is a great idea, but 50 extra dinners will go to waste.  Also, ask for help.  You can't carry all of this on your own and your friends and family are probably more than willing and happy to help.  They don't know you're struggling; chances are you're really good at hiding it.  

You have died of dysentery
Stressing yourself out, not eating right, and putting looks above your health will all lead you getting sick.  Also I don't know about other brides, but I have bipolar eating habits due to wedding planning.  Either I am incredibly busy and forget to eat or I'm overwhelmed and want to stress-eat an entire box of oreos.  I know that makes no sense, but I really didn't promise it would. Moral:  Take care of your body.  Eat right and exercise when you can.  Eat that oreo when you really need it.
**Sidenote:  It's really embarrassing when you ask your teacher what dysentery is in front of the entire class.**

What's so freaking great about Oregon anyway?!
Remember that this journey is leading up to the rest of your life.  The adage "it's not about the destination, its about the journey" DOES NOT APPLY HERE.  It's where you'll be and who you're with at the end of the day that matters.  So don't sweat the small stuff, keep your loved ones close, and get excited about the future that awaits.

And there you have it.  Wedding lessons straight from the pioneers.  So much more useful than whatever that bitch Mavis was trying to teach me anyways.  She's just mad because they named her Mavis.

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